As I was reading another blog, something began to, yet again, resonate with me. I have consistently been in organizations, whether military or academic, that have held certain core values. This goes far beyond Mottos, including "As we grow in Age, may we grow in Grace" or "Semper Paratis" or "AMDG". These institutions valued integrity.
By Webster's, Integrity is defined as: 1. the quality or state of being complete; unbroken condition, wholeness 3. the quality or state of being of being of sound moral principle,; uprightness, honesty, and sincerity.
I am in love with the first definition. It speaks so loudly as to how I envision living my life. Honesty and sincerity have been almost as fibrous to me as my own muscles. Unfortunately, I learned to be less and less honest, both with myself and others around me. I used the convenient masks of omission or avoidance, inappropriate timing or "something told me not to". I have wasted so much energy by denying my own truth and integrity. It amazes me.
Whenever a new person walks into my life, I have to ask myself(God) if this is a reason, a season, or a lifetime friend? When I take the time to be still, I find that many of what I thought were lifetime friends were not. I was not willing to let go and have some integrity about myself. I chose to hang on, yelling and screaming, until the parting was more like Ike and Tina, less like bittersweet sorrow. Again, this brings me back to ask what do I really value? Others ask why and I easily could give a laundry list of experiences. That isn't my point. I know life teaches me lessons. When we don't listen, the lessons get harder.
It takes a lot of strength to walk away from any person or situation that really doesn't reflect who you are. If you feel at odds with a friend, family member or spouse, maybe it's time to be still and listen to yourself/God. I am grateful for those who see me beyond the growing pains and love me for the person I am, in this moment and not last year or 20 years ago.
It takes integrity to create a life that is consistently fill with objects, events and people who value the simplicity in being honest and sincere. These expressions go hand in hand with a person's sense of peace and belonging. If you are passionate about something and it brings joy, stay. Although others in your life may have a good opinions, the only one that really counts is your own.
Integrity says to me that everything I do, I will do to the best of my ability without regret. I believe that is what God says to each of us. Do the best you can and I will handle the rest. Sin is when you chose to do things half-heartedly and without sincere effort. If I make a mis-take, I will learn from it and move on. I will not hang on to either the mistake or it's consequences. I will remain present in everything I do. Integrity reminds me to tackle one thing at a time, one day at a time and enjoy it.
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